#63. Not Being Haunted By Ghosts

If you visit a Black Person’s house, there are a lot of things you can expect to see. Music CDs. Bootleg DVDs. Hair products. Hot sauce. Malt liquor. Incense. Plenty of interesting things.

But what you will not see is ghosts.

You may not have realized it, but if you are afraid of ghosts you should move in with a Black Person immediately. If your house is haunted and you just can’t bare to part with it, have a Black Person move in with you and you will never experience another haunting ever again. Ever.

But how can this be? What special telekinetic powers do Black People have over apparitions?

No one knows for sure, but popular “reality” TV shows like “Ghost Hunters” and even fictional TV shows like “Supernatural” have facilitated the cold hard fact that Black People are never harassed by ghosts (only people who dress up as ghosts). The only people that see ghosts are Caucasian People, Asian People, and the occasional Hispanic Person. If a Black Person spins you a tale about how they were haunted or saw a ghost, they are clearly just desperate for attention.

However, this does not mean that Black People can not be killed by ghosts. Hollywood has shown us that if a Black Person is best friends with a Caucasian Person who is being haunted by a ghost, they most certainly will not live to see their next birthday. In such cases, the evil ghost opts to skip the haunting and jump straight to brutally killing the Black Person instead.

This all points to one undeniable conclusion. Ghosts are racist.

Posted on December 2, 2009, in Comedy and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.

  1. LMAO, I thought I was the only one who noticed this. Maybe they kill all the Black people off too because they know they can’t properly haunt with them being around.

    • I see we still have the KKK in town. As if what you write can harm or disrespect a black person any more than the damage you’ve done for centuries. You, your ancestors and your white seeds live, breathe and breed evil and hatred. Ask yourself why you hate black people so much and why you find this humorous? I suppose you don’t have an educated response to that question without resorting to random name calling. Let me start it off for you. White people smell like wet dog, like saliva in a mouth that hasn’t been near food for a week. May you rot in hell with the rest of your ancestors. Cunt.

      • Well there is a reason that white people hate black people. Because you are a foul, backwards and violent race of unevolved apes. Your kind cannot take care of themselves. So the government gives the blacks free housing, free food, free college and every handout possible. Yet black people still run every community they are in, straight to sh!t. They graffiti and destroy their housing, grow fat as hippos on their food stamps, sell drugs, pimp out their hoes, the black kids are wild and stupid as apes. The sleazy women have no clue what a family unit is and so they pop out litters of hideous cromag children with different “baby daddies”. Even with “affirmative action”, which is basically stealing jobs from qualified white people to give to stuttering apes, black people are nonstop failures for their entire lives. Turn on the news any day and see black people behaving badly. . Rioting, attacking cops, raping, robbing. Greasy afros, pants hanging down to the knees, and even your own bastardization of the English language called “ebonics”. Black people will NEVER fit in to civilized white America. Too bad we didn’t ship you all back to Nigeria when we could, where you fit right in with the savages. *spits in disgust*

  2. LOL. that is frickin funny!

  3. Ummm, Whoopie Goldberg was in GHOST, where she was haunted by a GHOST, if black people love movies, love movies starring black people, and love doing anything famous black people do, they would at least pretend to be haunted by Patrick Swayze.

  4. Funny post. I just have one correction: Hispanic people, at least if they are currently residing in latin america, are more prone to see a ghost or experience a paranormal situation than white and asian people combined.

  5. I’m half Black and I don’t take offense to this because I watch a lot of paranormal shows and I have never seen a Black family with a haunted house or a ghost problem. Now my thing is either A. Ghosts don’t like Black people. Or B. Black people do not tolerate ghost nonsense. Now, plenty of Black people I’m sure believe in ghosts (including myself), but they just do not get haunted. In my family nonsense isn’t tolerate by people so there is no way a ghost would be allowed to run around our house and break stuff, hide it, wake people up, etc. I know my da would not tolerate that crap and he’d whip a ghost’s ass. So, either there is some really strange coincidence that on these shows there are never Black people being haunted or Black people just do not tolerate the nonsense of ghosts. I know I don’t.

  6. DividedStatesofAmerica

    Would you wanna live with Negros?? FOR ETERNITY!!

  7. DividedStatesofAmerica

    In reality though, I think it’s the TOTAL opposite… When Negroes see something they can’t explain, (a “Haint”), They’re G O N E ! ! ! Negroes are the most superstitious people around… Especially Southerners..

  8. If I were a ghost or demon, I would not mess with a black person. Simply because they don’t seem to be easily fucked with, like white people.

  9. Blacks are the Ancent Hebrews … Also very Spiritual culturally…Ghost hate people of YAH!

  10. Know a black guy that said his dog would not go in the dog house cause it’s haunted. Known a few that think the woods are haunted. Yeah, they never see a ghost, some just think they are everywhere. Might be more of a Southern thing where there’s more superstition.

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