Blog Archives

#46. Going Back To Prison

arrestAs much as incarcerated Black People dig getting out of prison, it doesn’t beat going right back to prison.

“But why would Black People dig going back to prison?” you ask? The answers may shock you.

When an incarcerated Black Person gets out of prison, he (or even she) will not have many options. Sure, there are some Black People who can manage to put their past behind them and make a new life for themselves by becoming a productive member of society… and then there are the formerly incarcerated Black People who become so consumed with obtaining a Cadillac Escalade with chrome rims and expensive tennis shoes that the only way to do so is to turn to crime. After all, most employers are far more likely to hire someone with a clean record and a collage education instead of a (Black) ex-con with a GED.

And so, the only place where a formerly incarcerated Black Person can feel any sense of acceptance or purpose (no matter how superficial) is in prison. Unless they become rappers. And even then going to prison could enhance their reputation and greatly increase their street cred. As long as there are prisons in America there will be Black People in them.

#28. Spanking Their Children and Not Apologizing For It

spankingIn June 2007, Ernest Haycraft (Caucasian Person), was arrested for beating his child with a belt. His mistake? He was Caucasian.

You see, where Caucasian People are looked down upon and condemned for dispensing some leather justice on their child’s behind, it is perfectly acceptable and even encouraged in the Black Community. Many Black People who were spanked as children have grown into adults and even thanked their parents for properly disciplining them. But why? The answers may shock you.

Really, it all goes back to slavery.

When Black People were slaves they were repeatedly whipped and beaten, sometimes half to death, sometimes all the way to death. Slavery may have ended over 140 years ago, but Black People have decided to continue to adopt the practice of disciplining their children in much the same way (albeit without the “death” part).

It is also worth mentioning that many methods Caucasian People use to discipline their children (time outs, punishments, restricting television or Internet privileges) just doesn’t seem to work on Black People’s children the same way a belt, brush or extension cord across the behind most certainly does.

So if you are a Caucasian Person with a problem child and are afraid of being arrested for properly disciplining your child, call your nearest Black representative and they will be right over to do the job for you, sometimes without even getting paid. After all it is a public service.